One of the things that troubles my clients the most while going through
Texas divorce process is that they feel that they are following the rules while their ex is
ignoring the rules and getting away with it. From my experience everyone
is frustrated by this behavior:
Texas Divorce attorneys at our office
- The opposing counsel
When this occurs in the cases we handle we will provide you with advice
on what to do and what legal options are available. You may feel frustrated
to see your spouse getting away with bad behavior. It may be even more
frustrating if yours is like a lot of our cases in that this behavior
is similar to what was going on in the marriage that led to the
Your Spouse may be trying to Provoke You
This type of behavior is one more way for your ex to make you feel:
- like you have been victimized all over again
- A reminder that it does not matter that you are no longer together they
will find a way to manipulate the situation and mess with your life
We hear this complaint all the time. The situations are often very different.
However, the emotions are similar. Our clients sometimes ask why they
should follow the rules when their spouse is not. This is a natural question
with several good answers for.
Follow Your Attorney’s Advice
Often time’s clients do not like the advice because there is not
an immediate solution. If the a parent is withholding the children our
clients would like us to make a phone call that gets the cops to break
down the door that day and have the children return. Unfortunately the
law does not work that way. Generally involves our clients following the
rules even when their spouse is not. This is good advice, because:
- When we take your spouse to court asking the court to enforce the rules
we do you’re your ex saying that you are not following them either.
If you do what you are supposed to do such as allowing your spouse to have
visitation with the children then we have a better when we go to court
on a motion to
compel or enforce if yours spouse is found to be in violation of the court order they will
required to pay your fees and costs.
Motions to Compel or Enforce
Texas divorce cases we generally cannot make pay for entirety of the
divorce case. However, when a spouse is violating a courts order we can ask the court
to make the violating spouse that pay for things where they have unnecessarily
increased the bill. This can include:
- Not paying court ordered spousal support
- Not paying court ordered child support
- Not responding to discovery
- Missing mediation
- Anything else a court may have ordered that your spouse has not complied with
By your following the courts orders we have a stronger argument for why
we deserve to receive fees and your spouse deserves to be sanctioned.
It’s a Good idea to wear the White Hat
Another good reason for following the rules, is that by doing so a judge
will be more inclined to believe and side with you. If you and your spouse
are both breaking rules, the judge will probably see it as a case of “he
said, she said” where it is almost impossible for the judge to tell
who was right and who was wrong. You want to seem like a mature person
to the Judge.
When a person does wrong this is called “unclean hands.” What
that means is that it’s hard to accuse someone of something that
we are equally guilty of doing. Both you and your spouse would be going
into court with unclean hands.
If we have been following the rules then we have clean hands. If your spouse
has been violating the rules there hands are unclean. This puts us in
a strong position when we ask the court for help. It is important to come
into the court in as strong a position as possible.
Judges do not like when people violate their rules. If a Judge does not
like a particular person based on their actions it will often be reflected
in their ruling. Do not underestimate the importance of wearing the white
hat, looking reasonable, and collected in front of the judge.
Often times the things in the marriage that lead to the divorce were not
great. I tell people that come to see me they are not alone and that most
people do not come to see me when everything is puppy dogs and rainbows.
However, a divorce is often like going from one bad period in your life
It is important to keep in mind that:
- You are not alone.
family law issues are emotional and complicated.
- Divorce is said to be the second most stressful thing people go through.
- People do get through the process
If you haven’t already, consider seeing a therapist.
Many of our clients going through a divorce find talking to therapist to
be helpful. A therapist has been trained to help you work through your
feelings and to deal with them in as productive a way as possible. Talking
to a therapist does not mean you are crazy. Having emotions and feelings
while going through a divorce is a normal reaction to difficult circumstances.
It is not uncommon for our clients to:
- Want to talk their feelings through with us
- We do not mind when they do this. However, we are not necessarily your
best option to talk to.
- We can listen, but, at the end of the day, we are trained in emotions or
how to help you process them.
- We are trained in the law and how to help you get legal remedies.
Your feelings are normal and understandable, a therapist may be able to
help you work though them during and after the
If you want to know more about what you can do,
CLICK the button below to get your
“16 Steps to Help You Plan & Prepare for Your Texas Divorce”
Other Articles you may be interested in:
- 6 things You Need to Know Before You File for Divorce in Texas
- I Want a Texas Divorce but My Husband Doesn't: What can I do?
- Am I Married? - Marital Status in Texas
- Can I sue my spouse's mistress in Texas?
- 6 Tips - On How to prepare for a Texas Divorce
- Roadmap of Basic Divorce Procedure in Texas
- Child Custody Basics in Texas
- 6 Mistakes that can Destroy Your Texas Divorce Case
- 10 Quick Tips About Parental Visitation
- Does it Matter who Files First in a Texas Divorce?
Law Office of Bryan Fagan | Spring, Texas Divorce Lawyers
The Law Office of Bryan Fagan routinely handles matters that affect children
and families. If you have questions regarding
divorce, it's important to speak with one of our
Spring, TX Divorce Lawyers right away to protect your rights.
divorce lawyers in Spring TX are skilled at listening to your goals during this trying process and
developing a strategy to meet those goals.
Contact Law Office of Bryan Fagan by calling (281) 810-9760 or submit your contact information in our online
form. The Law Office of Bryan Fagan handles
Divorce cases in Spring, Texas, Cypress, Klein,
The Woodlands, the FM 1960 area, or surrounding areas, including
Fort Bend County and