In part one of the Law Office of Bryan Fagan’s series of blog posts on basic divorce questions, we discussed whether or not it was a good idea to file for divorce and represent yourself rather than hire an attorney to do so.
In today’s post we will run down a number of what I believe to be pertinent issues that can affect your decision making when it comes to your potential divorce. The first question is one that every single person who filed for divorce has asked themselves: “Should I get divorced?”
To proceed or not to proceed (with a divorce)
This is a question that you ought to think about long and hard before coming in to talk to a lawyer. There is no going back from considering divorce. Once it is more than just a possibility to you then it will remain in the front of your brain and stay there until and unless you and your spouse get counseling and therapy to help erase the underlying stressors that brought about the consideration in the first place.
A family lawattorney is not the right person to go to when you are trying to decide whether or not to get a divorce. No lawyer, myself included, will know enough about the inter-workings of your family to give you a clear answer on whether or not a divorce should be pursued. Divorce is, as I’m fond of saying to clients, different than a personal injury case, business dispute or consumer related complaint. A family law case, especially divorce, is intensely personal. So much so that the decision to ultimately file for divorce must be made by you after careful thought.
With that said, there are some circumstances that make it easier to decide to move forward with the divorce than others. These are (thankfully) not all that common but I think are ones that we all would agree are justifiable grounds to file for divorce.
Drug or alcohol abuse by your spouse
Not only are people who abuse drugs and alcohol harming themselves physically, but their mental state is such that he or she will say just about anything to further their addiction. The truth is a foreign concept to people in the throes of addiction. While it is admirable to attempt to help your spouse out of this situation, if you are not able to do so then a divorce is probably necessary.
Your personal safety as well as that of your children is in jeopardy remaining in the same house as a person with an addiction such as this.
There is no excuse for one spouse to physically harm the other. Under no circumstances can this sort of behavior be justified. Unfortunately, the victim of relationship violence often believes that it is their fault that the abuse is occurring. The abuser often uses their words to convince their victim that he or she care about them deeply and the abuse is just a manifestation of how much care he or she has for them. Removing yourself from a violent spouse and filing for divorce is not only sensible but can save your life as well.
This is a circumstance where some people believe in immediately ending the marriage relationship and filing for divorce. Other spouses believe that it is their duty as husband or wife to attempt to seek counseling to try and save the marriage and address the reasons why their spouse may have strayed from the marriage.
Regardless, the vow that people take on their wedding day precludes any other relationships for both spouses. When one spouse honors that commitment while the other does not there is justification for divorce.
Factors that often times lead to divorce
From my experience as a family law attorney I can report that financial problems are probably the leading cause of people getting divorced. Whether it is a lack of income in the household, uncontrolled spending or simply not communicating and working together, when it comes to money the falling off point towards divorce can come quickly.
Ask yourself- does your spouse communicate with you in regard to finances? Do you share a bank account? Do you let the other one know prior to making a large purchase? Is your spouse secretive about his or her spending? Do you have access to your bank accounts and other financial accounts?
If you review your answers to these questions and get the impression that you and your spouse are not on the same page then it may be a good time to speak to your spouse about working together in financial matters.
The reason why working together when it comes to money is so crucial is that if you and your spouse can find common ground and achieve your financial goals together it is likely that you can do so in other areas of your life as well. Sitting down to hammer out a family budget means being open and honest about what each of you earn on a monthly basis and committing to one another through shared promises. It also means reaching for the same goals.
If you and your spouse are drifting along in your lives without a common goal or goals, then it is much easier to decide on a divorce than if you are working towards a better future together.
Questions about the Divorce process in Texas? Contact the Law Office of Bryan Fagan today
If you have questions about divorce and would like to know more about the legal process surrounding it please do not hesitate to contact the Law Office of Bryan Fagan. Our licensed family law attorneys are available to meet with you six days a week to answer questions and provide you with information about our office and the services we provide to clients. A consultation is always free of charge and can go a long way towards helping you understand an important and difficult process.
If you want to know more about what you can do, CLICK the button below to get your FREE E-book: “16 Steps to Help You Plan & Prepare for Your Texas Divorce”
If you want to know more about how to prepare, CLICK the button below to get your FREE E-book: “13 Dirty Tricks to Watch Out For in Your Texas Divorce, and How to Counter Them" Today!”
Other Articles you may be interested in:
- Basic Divorce Questions Answered
- Frequently Asked Questions Regarding Texas Annulment
- 10 Facts You Never Knew About Texas Annulment
- How an annulment is different than a divorce in Texas
- Frequently Asked Questions Regarding Common Law Marriage and Divorce
- Frequently Asked Questions Regarding Texas Marriage
- Frequently Asked Questions in Texas Divorce Cases
- 15 Myths About Divorce in Texas
- 9 Questions to Ask Yourself and the Divorce Lawyer Before You Hire Them
- Common Questions about Texas Prenuptial and Marital Agreements
- Should I sign a Texas Premarital or Prenuptial Agreement?
- My Fiancé wants me to sign a Texas Prenup. What should I do?
- Making Postnuptial Agreements Stick in a Texas Divorce
- Can I sue my spouse's mistress in Texas?
Law Office of Bryan Fagan | Houston, Texas Divorce Lawyers
The Law Office of Bryan Fagan routinely handles matters that affect children and families. If you have questions regarding Divorce, it's important to speak with one of our Houston, TX Child Divorce Lawyers right away to protect your rights.
Our Divorce lawyers in Spring TX are skilled at listening to your goals during this trying process and developing a strategy to meet those goals. Contact Law Office of Bryan Fagan by calling (281) 810-9760 or submit your contact information in our online form. The Law Office of Bryan Fagan handles Divorce cases in Houston, Texas, Cypress, Klein, Humble, Kingwood, Tomball, The Woodlands, the FM 1960 area, or surrounding areas, including Harris County, Montgomery County, Liberty County, Chambers County, Galveston County, Brazoria County, Fort Bend County and Waller County.