Skip to content 
Working up the courage to file for divorce is arguably the toughest step in the entire divorce process. You have probably heard the saying: the journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. This is certainly true about a divorce. When it comes to getting divorced it can be a challenge to finally decide on ending your marriage. The finality of the relationship is bad enough. However, the difficulties associated with getting a divorce are no walk in the park, either.
That does not mean that you should shy away from a divorce, however. When a marriage is failing there is nothing tougher than going home and seeing your spouse. You know that the marriage has no future. Going through the motions may delay the inevitable but it won’t work forever. Something is going to give. It may be that your spouse decides to file for divorce out of the blue. Or. You could decide to go through with the divorce after waiting a long time.
The Law Office of Bryan Fagan knows what it is like to work with clients during a divorce. We have served thousands of neighbors here in the Lone Star State in divorce lawsuits. Interested in learning more about how our streamlined process can help you take that first step toward a completed divorce? Then stick around and read on for today’s blog post.
Hiring an attorney is like hiring a divorce accountability partner
Imagine being in a plane, ready to skydive. The parachute is in the backpack, strapped to your back. You’ve got your flight suit, helmet, and goggles on. The plane has taken off and is cruising to the correct altitude. You have been psyching yourself up for this experience all week. Now, the moment of truth is approaching. You decide to go ahead and inch closer to the open door. When you peer over the edge, however, you just can’t bring yourself to jump.
Juxtapose this with a parachute jump where you are not only equipped for the jump but also an experienced parachuter that you are strapped to. So, not only have you been psyching yourself up all week, but you have also been physically attached to another human. That person is going to jump. He knows what he is doing, and he is prepared for the experience. All you need to do is go along for the ride.
Now, a divorce is not exactly like this. Don’t think of your attorney as just another person who is going to drag you out the airplane door (so to speak). However, he or she is the person who will help you take that first jump. Often the first jump is the toughest. While you are in the divorce you are making more decisions than a parachute jumper. However, if you are working with an experienced family law attorney that jump is going to come a lot easier for you.
Don’t know how to begin the divorce? Find your “why”
You may know what you want to accomplish in the divorce. That “what” likely has something to do with getting out of the divorce in one piece. There may be some general goals thrown in about property division or child custody. However, many people enter a divorce with no goal in mind. Just going with the flow, I suppose you could say. The divorce may make sense on some level, but it is not as if you want to work towards goals. It’s better to try and figure out those goals during the case, right?
This could not be any further from the truth. In reality. you want to have goals established for yourself early in the case. Preferably, the goals you have should be discovered before the case is even filed. This way you can figure out how to manage those goals when circumstances change in the case. Keep your eye on the prize, in other words. Otherwise, when life comes at you in the divorce you are prone to flapping in the breeze without any sort of discernable goals.
What we are suggesting in today’s blog post is that you need to discover your “why.” Once you find your why you then have your motivation. That reason or series of reasons why you are putting up with your ex-spouse or going through the trouble of a divorce. This is not always easy to do. Many times, you will need to take a great deal of time to think about your goals and how they impact your family. So, take the necessary time and figure things out on your own. Or better yet, consult with one of the attorneys at the Law Office of Bryan Fagan at no cost.
Streamlining the process of signing up with our office
One of the important yet overlooked parts of hiring an attorney is the sign-up portion of a case. When you start to think about hiring an attorney one of the first things you need to consider is who can help you begin your case. Some attorneys will take your retainer check and then set your file to the side. Other cases may take more immediate priority over yours. There are a million reasons why an attorney may not file your divorce immediately.
That is not how the Law Office of Bryan Fagan works. Our attorneys will work with you to file your divorce quickly. However, we only do so after speaking with you extensively about what you want to accomplish in the case. Your circumstances, goals, concerns, and needs are all relevant to our attorneys. We work with you to develop a game plan tailor-made to your case and your family.
When you come into our office we go over a contract with you. That way you know what to expect when you hire us. We do not bury important language in the hard to read places. Rather, we believe that what you see is what you get. Don’t just take my word for it. Rather, contact the Law Office of Bryan Fagan for a free-of-charge consultation. We will show you that our office is committed to serving you and your family from the moment you walk through our door.
Electronic signatures during a divorce
With the advent of technology, we have seen the world of personal interaction take a significant step back. This does not mean that it is not important to interact and speak to people on one basis anymore. However, it means that there is less of an emphasis on those interactions. Meetings frequently take place on a video screen rather than in person. Even family law mediators have gotten on this bandwagon by offering virtual or remote mediation.
These options are positive developments when you consider that we are no longer held back by being a distance from one another. However, they are not positive when you consider that there is something lost when people stop meeting face-to-face. This is why we at the Law Office of Bryan Fagan make every effort to meet with you in person. If your preference is to talk to one of our attorneys face to face then contact us today.
With that said, if you are unable to meet with us face to face that is ok, too. In that situation, we not only provide virtual consultations but do not stop there. You may sign any documents you have reviewed using electronic signatures. This means that you do not have to drive into our office only to sign a few pages. Talk to the attorneys with the Law Office of Bryan Fagan today to find out more about how we can guide and assist you in a divorce scenario.
The importance of negotiation
Contrary to what many people will have you believe about divorce, most of the process involves negotiation over litigation. By this, we mean that there are many opportunities during a case to focus on the common goals that you and your spouse have. It may not seem like it now, but there are several points in a divorce where the two of you may be able to work together.
This accomplishes several items in your case. First, it allows you to avoid a long and tedious divorce. Significant cost and time commitments are a part of a divorce. By working together through negotiation, you can speed up the conclusion of your case. A faster divorce, in and of itself, should not necessarily be a goal. However, a faster divorce where your goals can be accomplished is not a bad thing.
The most important aspect of a case is mediation when it comes to divorce negotiation. Mediation involves you and your spouse working alongside an experienced family law mediator. The mediator assists you and your spouse by helping you focus on the areas most important to your case. Mediation also puts you in a position where you are focused on the task at hand. You devote a certain period to going through the important issues of your case together. This is as opposed to your normal life where your attention is often diverted towards other ongoing issues.
The drawbacks of negotiation with a spouse are not cooperate
Unfortunately, all the benefits of negotiation are not felt when one spouse is uncooperative or outright refuses to participate. When your spouse refuses to participate in a divorce negotiation that shows that he or she is not committed to the same process you are. This may not come as a surprise to you, however. Wanting to go about the divorce in a way that is respectful and committed to communication is admirable. Having a spouse who does not see the case in the same way you do makes the possibility of negotiation more remote.
There are still ways to negotiate with your spouse even if he or she is not always agreeable. First, there is a possibility that your spouse has hired an attorney who understands the importance of negotiation. At that point, your settlement offers can be funneled through the attorney. Hopefully, that attorney communicates the settlement offers to your spouse promptly. Family law attorneys are committed to helping individuals resolve their disputes efficiently.
Next, court-ordered mediation forces your spouse to participate in negotiation. It is not as if he or she can simply defer to a hearing or trial. Rather, most courts will require that you attempt mediation at least once before a trial or temporary orders hearing. You can check the requirements of your court once your divorce has been filed. This will give you the ability to plan and have peace of mind. The last thing you want is to go into a divorce with an uncooperative spouse and no plan.
Preparing for a divorce when your spouse is uncooperative
Again, just because you anticipate that your spouse is not going to cooperate during a divorce does not mean that you do not have to prepare. Preparation in a divorce is key. For one, it forces you to focus your attention on specific goals to be accomplished. When you are looking at a case from the perspective of goal setting it forces you to develop a plan. Next, having a strategy geared towards accomplishing your goals is also essential. Goals without a plan are mere dreams. When you have a set plan in place the goals you have start to become fully formed.
If you have minor children preparation for divorce means determining their best interests. Courts make decisions regarding child custody based on the best interest of your children. The best interests of the child’s standard is a time-tested method. It attempts to take into consideration your child’s current and future circumstances. They are educational, emotional, and relational situations that matter in a best interests determination.
On the property division side of the divorce, preparing a basic inventory is not something you necessarily need help with from your spouse. If you have access to your home you can prepare a basic inventory. Walk from room to room and document what you see. Take pictures, and save those photos to a place your spouse cannot access. This allows you to keep track of what you own. From there, consider the other aspects of your case such as your financial accounts and debts. These aspects of your financial life are sometimes overlooked. However, it is a mistake to overlook them. Unaccounted-for financial accounts result in dissatisfaction among spouses who go through divorce cases.
Default judgments in a divorce
When you begin the divorce process it is necessary to provide notice of the divorce to your spouse. This notice cannot be provided directly by you. A phone call or text message to your spouse that you have filed for divorce does not count. Rather, you must personally serve your spouse with the divorce petition and other paperwork. However, this is not always easy when your spouse refuses to participate. What can you do in a situation like this?
To help get your divorce off the ground, courts will often approve alternative methods of service in a situation like this. An example of an alternative method of service is publishing your divorce notice in a newspaper or magazine. Even if your spouse does not read it, it provides your spouse with what is known as constructive notice of the divorce. While not preferred, these alternative methods of service allow your case to begin when you have a spouse who does not participate.
From there, you need to wait the requisite period, usually around 60 days, to obtain a default judgment against your uncooperative spouse. A default judgment may become necessary when you have a spouse who does not answer your divorce petition. The benefit of a default judgment is that you can draft court orders based on your interests and those of your children. So long as those interests are not incredibly one-sided the result of your case would be an order that you draft and provide to the court.
Representation when the opposing party is uncooperative
Having an experienced attorney by your side is important when your spouse is uncooperative. Many people who have uncooperative spouses in a divorce find that they have trouble moving the case along. This is because serving notice to your spouse, negotiating court orders, and proceeding with the case are made more difficult when your spouse does not communicate with you. Having an experienced family law attorney to help push the case along is a great benefit to you and your family during this time.
Questions about the material contained in today’s blog post? Contact the Law Office of Bryan Fagan
The attorneys with the Law Office of Bryan Fagan offer free of charge consultations six days a week in person, over the phone, and via video. These consultations are a great way for you to learn more about the world of Texas family law. Before signing a document or negotiating on a subject you do not know well, contact our office. We look forward to the opportunity of serving you during an important part of your life. The Law Office of Bryan Fagan is on your side.
