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Getting a divorce is never easy, especially during the challenges of the COVID pandemic. While you can find plenty of resources online or in bookstores claiming to simplify the process, the reality is that stress and concern are almost inevitable. Whether you choose to initiate the divorce or face it unexpectedly, you’ll likely encounter difficulties along the way. Navigating a divorce during COVID requires introspection and deliberate decision-making to benefit yourself and your family in the long run.
Some of the most important decisions you will have to make regarding your divorce will occur after the divorce is complete. By then, you will have a family court order, called a final decree of divorce, signed by all the parties, your attorneys, and the judge. These are your marching orders regarding dividing property between yourself and your spouse, as well as the structure of raising children in separate households. You and your spouse will either have gone to court and had a judge issue these orders, or you will have negotiated these orders in mediation. However, regardless of how you arrived at these orders, you must follow them now and in the future.
Navigating Life After Divorce During the Coronavirus Pandemic
I don’t think any of us have felt more concerned about the future than we do now. As the coronavirus pandemic continues, we must consider what our lives look like today and how they will change in the coming weeks, months, and years. While many people are more than ready to offer their predictions about what the future will look like, the truth is that none of us know exactly what the future holds regarding anything.
Significant events like a viral pandemic can influence our future lives, but so can relatively minor events that are personal to our families. For instance, a tornado might destroy only your home, while a hurricane could flood an entire region. In both situations, your life will change, but the extent of that impact will differ.
That brings us to the topic of today’s blog post. All of us are dealing with the impacts of the coronavirus pandemic. Relatively few of us are dealing with the effects of coming off of a divorce during the coronavirus pandemic. Suppose you are working through taking steps to improve your life during this time. After the conclusion of a divorce, then today’s blog post is for you. I have some thoughts to share with you on how to begin to rebuild your life and your career after your divorce. Much of the information that I am going to share with you is applicable at any time. However, I hope this advice is convenient for those coming off of divorce during this pandemic.
Rebuilding your life after a divorce
Call me crazy, but I can’t think of a better time for you to be approaching the question of how to rebuild your life after a divorce than right now in the wake of this pandemic. I know it may seem incredibly daunting during this time. Still, I think there are unique aspects to rebuilding your life right now that can help you focus better and be mindful of what goals are significant to consider, given that you have already been going through crazy. In your own life, I think ongoing changes due to the pandemic may be beneficial to you in some ways. Let me explain.
Finding Clarity and Focus After Divorce During Uncertain Times
My thoughts on this subject revolve around the idea that if you need to rebuild your life after a divorce, you might as well do it while the whole world is also going through changes. But what does it mean to rebuild your life after divorce? From a family perspective, it can be helpful to reflect on what truly matters to you as you determine your next steps. Often, our attention gets pulled in many directions, making it difficult to focus on the things that will bring you happiness and contentment in your post-divorce life. In this way, we are a bit like big-mouth bass; when we see something shiny, we tend to chase after it, often to the detriment of other important areas of our lives.
Well, I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but not much has been shining in our world for months now. Or at least that’s the way that we have been made to feel regarding the world and the pandemic in general. With fewer things going on and therefore fewer things to divert our attention, you have a better opportunity to focus on the essential things now as you are coming off of a divorce.
Strengthening Bonds and Finances Post-Divorce
For instance, you may be concerned with your family life after your divorce has ended. No matter how your child custody situation Was resolved, you may be dissatisfied with the outcome. If you are concerned with rebuilding your relationship with your children, now is as good a time as any to take steps towards doing so. Your children may find themselves in situations where they are not attending school for the beginning of this school year in may have more flexible schedules to spend more time with you than they would have had the pandemic not been ongoing. Take some time to communicate to your ex-spouse about ways that you believe both of you can benefit from spending time with your children right now.
Consider what is most important to you in your life and what steps you need to take to strengthen those areas. For example, now is a terrific time to get a hold of your finances. This may seem counterintuitive given the degree of job loss we have seen in our area and across the nation. Still, if you are fortunate enough to be in a position with stable employment, the steps you can take to rebuild your financial life do not have to be dramatic. Here are a few tips I could give you on rebuilding your finances in the wake of a divorce.
Rebuilding your financial life after a divorce
Before you can take concrete steps towards achieving financial goals, you must control where your money is going. During your divorce, it may have felt like your money has been stretched thinner than at any time before. A divorce is a particular time for a person as bills and responsibilities that they had never encountered before suddenly become relevant in their lives. With that said, the feeling of having your finances out of your control can be a scary one.
From my experience, I would recommend getting yourself on a reasonable budget each month. There isn’t as much value in trying to project your income and expenses months into the future, but you are more than capable of doing so weeks into the future, even if you have an irregular income. Try sitting down without any distractions At the end of this month and begin budgeting for September. These budgets do not have to be complex. All you have to do is get a handle on the money you make and any expenses you have. It may be the first time in your life that you have ever done something like this.
Facing Financial Realities: Taking Control After Divorce
What you find in your budget may surprise and even upset you. That’s OK. Sometimes the process of rebuilding your life, especially from a financial perspective, can be a bit disheartening. However, I would feel disheartened to discover that expenses and debts are spiraling out of control when you could have taken steps to prevent it. You might just need to get organized and allocate your income more effectively. Or, you may be in a place where your monthly expenses are greater than your monthly income. This means that additional forms of employment or a career change may be necessary.
Whatever your specific situation is in your life after a divorce, you need to understand that you can take concrete steps towards improving your situation. I do not doubt that the challenges you face are significant. However, I also believe that the challenges you face are all relative and that we rarely face obstacles and challenges that we cannot surmount. Getting organized and being intentional is the best way to start rebuilding your life after a divorce.
Rebuilding your career after divorce during the coronavirus pandemic
As opposed to rebuilding your personal life after divorce during the COVID-19 pandemic, the steps towards rebuilding your career are likely to be much more straightforward. I say this because your personal life has both emotions and outside circumstances are weighing in on the subject. On the other hand, near-professional life and career have more to do with external factors and less with emotion. Yes, your frustrations and emotions may be a part of rebuilding a job after your divorce, but other people’s emotions are less relevant in this discussion.
I often think about people who have just gone through a divorce and need to establish or re-establish their careers. You may find that you have fewer responsibilities after your divorce than you did while married, especially if you are newly divorced and don’t have children. Previously, you might have had financial obligations related to your ex-spouse that forced you to stay in a job you didn’t enjoy. For example, if you worked solely for the health insurance because your ex-spouse had a medical condition, you might no longer need to remain in that job since you are no longer responsible for their care.
This period offers a unique freedom in your professional life. Use the months after your divorce to explore new opportunities. Consider part-time jobs to cover expenses while attending school or obtaining certifications for a different field. Remember, you don’t have to follow the same career path if it isn’t fulfilling. While the divorce may have been stressful, your post-divorce career doesn’t have to be.
Conclusion
Navigating a divorce during COVID presents unique challenges that can amplify the emotional and logistical hurdles of ending a marriage. Despite the difficulties, it’s important to remember that this journey also offers an opportunity for personal growth and positive change. By seeking support, utilizing available resources, and prioritizing clear communication, you can manage the complexities of your situation more effectively. Ultimately, taking deliberate steps during this difficult time will empower you to build a brighter future for yourself and your family.
Other Related Articles
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- Life After Divorce: Is it Possible to Find Love Again?
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- What Happens After Divorce Papers are Served in Texas?
- How Do You Afford Things After Divorce?
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- Financial Freedom After Divorce: Texas Truths!
- Is Life Harder After Divorce?
Questions about a career in life in general after a difficult divorce? Contact the Law Office of Bryan Fagan
If you have any questions about the material contained in today’s blog post, please do not hesitate to contact the Law Office of Bryan Fagan. Our licensed family law attorneys offer free-of-charge consultations six days a week in person, over the phone, and via video. These consultations are an excellent opportunity for you to learn more about our office and our client’s services. Our attorneys and staff take a great deal of pride in serving our neighbors and community members throughout the family law courts of Southeast Texas.
