Going through a storm like a divorce means seeking calm. Seeking calm looks like different things for different people. Thinking of calm makes me think of rest, peace, and recuperation. Those attributes immediately take me home. Calling one place home is what makes a house a home. Looking at the most beautiful house in the world means nothing when all you want is your bed. Laying your head down at night safely. These are the hallmarks of a home.
Unfortunately, going through a divorce means experiencing some degree of uncertainty and unease. The qualities mentioned above are not found easily during a divorce. Predictability is not a hallmark of divorce, either. Therefore, being interested in finding some predictability and stability is a noble goal for your case. We are discussing temporary housing options during divorce in today’s blog post from the Law Office of Bryan Fagan.
Offering free-of-charge consultations to our community, the Law Office of Bryan Fagan cares about you and your family. Come today and speak to us about your case and your situation. Providing you with practical and helpful information in a comfortable setting is what these consultations are all about. Jumping into the topic of temporary housing options during a divorce- let’s begin.
Leaving the family house during a divorce
Leaving the family home during your divorce is a distinct possibility. Guessing what can happen in a divorce case is not easy, however. Many options exist as far as who moves out and who stays put. However, considering a hypothetical situation means giving yourself a plan to deal with these changes. Being on top of your situation and your options is ideal even in an uncertain time like a divorce.
Having to exit the family house during a divorce brings to mind many factors. Voluntarily leaving your home means choosing to exit before the situation worsens. When you and your spouse are not getting along leaving the house makes sense. Allowing the situation to escalate to violence is not wise. Therefore, finding a new place to live before and during the divorce saves you from a potentially combustible situation.
However, leaving the house voluntarily carries with it certain risks. Having children in the home and then voluntarily leaving is risky. For one, your children need you during the divorce. The stability you seek is also sought by your children. Children lack life experience and a processing ability for everything going on around them. Resulting in tough times for kids. Children display resiliency in divorce scenarios but they are not superheroes. You are their superhero. Finding stability for yourself means helping your child do the same.
Impacts on custody and conservatorship
Being a dad during the early parts of a divorce is not easy. Having seemingly divergent goals is common. Wanting to support your children is a great goal. Needing to maintain safety for the family is the responsibility of a father, as well. Feeling like the responsibility of leaving the home when times get uncomfortable typically falls on the father. Keeping the peace is what we are talking about here.
Going and finding a place to live during the divorce can disrupt your divorce case. Depending upon what your goals are for the case leaving the house ends up hurting many fathers. Asking the court for primary custody is a major endeavor for fathers. Fathers like yourself work outside the home which causes interesting dynamics in a divorce. Wanting primary custody means presenting a case in your children’s best interests and being served with you as the primary caretaker.
Making this contention means having a place in the home. Leaving the house during a divorce displays an unwillingness to work it out alongside your children. Or, at least, that is an argument presented by opposing attorneys with frequency. Staying the course and displaying a willingness to stick it out until the end? Or leaving the house and risk showing a judge that you jump ship at the first sign of trouble? Encountering extremes is not uncommon in difficult divorce cases.
Having an attorney can help with a divorce
Child conservatorship cases are notorious for their difficulty. Having so many issues happening concurrent to one another makes for a challenging environment. Managing your case, your expectations, and your family life at the same time is not easy. Finding a new place to live provides a fresh set of challenges in your day. Integrating your children into a post-divorce lifestyle is difficult emotionally and logistically.
Getting through the divorce in one piece is not a good enough goal, either. Thinking about all of these issues can be a challenge and a headache all rolled into one. For that reason, working with an experienced family law attorney with the Law Office of Bryan Fagan is a great idea. Nobody can determine the course of your case besides you. However, there are so many distractions in a typical divorce that legal representation becomes even more important.
That is not to say that an attorney makes decisions for you. Rather, an attorney from our office guides you in the decision-making process. Educating you on the law and how it interacts with your case. Helping you find peace of mind so that you can pay attention to finding a place to live. Contact us today for a free-of-charge consultation with an experienced family law attorney.
Where to go during the divorce
Having multiple options is best when it comes to finding a temporary place to live during a divorce. Options are good. The more options you have the better quality of decision you tend to make. Having one good option is ok. Having half a dozen good options is much better. Coming to the realization that you can choose between multiple options provides clarity like nothing else. Benefitting from these good options is a reality for your child, as well.
Family member offers you a place to stay
Finding out that you have a family member available who is offering you lodging is a great option to have in your back pocket. Having to pay rent for any period is a nice attribute of staying with family. Considering the costs of a divorce this is a major selling point to staying with family. Running out of options that you have already pursued? Contacting a family member who stands ready to help in a pinch is just what you need at a time like this.
First, look into not only members but their backgrounds. Recall that your children will be spending time with you in your residence during the divorce. Deciding to live with a family member who has a criminal or CPS history is a bad decision. Existing during the case is insufficient. Flattening your budget and staying with family shifts the price point of a case significantly.
Grandstanding to show off your supposed financial strength during the divorce is a mistake. Having the foresight to tell yourself that now may be the best time to rely more on your safety net is a true difference-maker in a divorce. Ignoring the difficulties of your case and circumstances and doing what is best for your children and yourself is key. Joking and having a good time with family members is a great way to take your mind off the case. Knowing what is in front of you as far as costs are concerned is all the more reason to stay with family, if possible.
Friends come to you in times of need
It is said that the mark of a good friend is that he comes to you at your lowest point and offers to help you. Living near friends is a great benefit aside from a divorce. Maximizing your relationship with this person means bringing up the subject of staying with him or her. Needing a response, it is not easy to ask for a deadline for a decision. Optimizing the situation means asking a friend for help when you need it.
Pretending that you do not need help is not beneficial for you or your child. Realizing that you are in a tough spot as far as balancing competing interests is the first step toward getting into stable housing. Stating the obvious: a place to rest your head is critical when you have a hurricane of a divorce. Telling a friend about your issues helps you to identify your most pressing issue in the case.
Understanding proper boundaries associated with staying at a friend’s home is something everyone involved can appreciate. Verifying the amount of time that you can stay with your friend and any other ground rules is fair. Welcoming you into your home is not something your friend has to do. Examining the suitability of your friend as a part-time roommate is a great thing to do, as well. Your friend does not need to help but a willing friend is a great asset to have in a divorce.
Renting your place to live
Realizing that you do not have friends or family in the area who can help you with finding a place to live can feel like a let-down. However, admitting to yourself that you need to look elsewhere for a place to stay provides you with clarity. Renting an apartment or home during the divorce allows you to maintain independence. Clearing out items for your family home and moving them into a new place is a powerful statement. You are striking out on your own and looking to the future.
With that said, here are some factors to consider when determining where and what to rent. Location relative to your children is important. Many times a person in your shoes finds an inexpensive home in a part of time far from their children. The apartment fits your bill but not your children. Speaking ideally the rental home needs to suit you, your children, and your budget. Leasing the first place you find could be a potentially big mistake.
Buying a home? Not during the divorce
Buying a home can be a tempting decision to make during the divorce. Many people in your shoes feel like buying a house is something that can close one life chapter and open another. Maintaining a sense of normalcy means homeownership to others. However, these feelings are misplaced. The calm and security you seek from home ownership are difficult to find. Understanding the limitations of home ownership during a divorce helps you to avoid mistakes.
Taking on a large amount of debt during a divorce is not sensible. Dividing up property and debts is an essential part of your divorce. A new home means debt and property rolled into one. There is ample time to purchase a home after the divorce. During the divorce, you should consolidate your assets and maximize your ability to save money wherever possible.
Renting a home does not equal throwing your money away. Renting is more like camping than anything else. Biding your time until something more appropriate comes along. Having patience in a divorce is an important attribute to possess. Holding off on buying a house is an example of how you can maximize that skill.
Examining your budget to discover your options
Each of you going through a divorce has a different set of circumstances to consider financially speaking. Having more money in savings means that you can afford to rent a bigger and better home during the divorce. Or, that same savings allows you to remain in the family home by paying the mortgage payment. High-income earners can do both.
This requires you to possess a complete understanding of your financial picture, however. Running a divorce case on a financial basis is impossible not knowing your budget. Start there and make better decisions as a result. Understanding how your budget functions is a step ahead of where many of you are. Creating a budget for the first time is a worthy goal in and of itself.
Figuring out how to create a budget is step number one. Taking your income is step one of the budget. Considering all your sources of income what is your total monthly income? Ignoring side hustles and side income sources is a mistake. Mother, taking into consideration all of the different sources of income, calculate what your take-home pay is. This is your top-line number and allows you to determine yeah the absolute maximum amount of money coming into your house each month.
This amount is an adjustment. Adding together your income and that of your spouse is what you are accustomed to. Now, count only your income and go from there. After you have your total net monthly income subtract out your household expenses. Remember you are responsible for paying household expenses even if you have moved out. Therefore, being in a situation where you have to pay rent and half of the mortgage limits the type of properties you can rent.
Additional expenses in a divorce
Additional expenses people find themselves incurring during a divorce include child support, temporary spousal support, and court costs. If you want something you need to ask these are new costs you are unaccustomed to paying. Taking these new costs into consideration means being reasonable with the amount of money you have to spend. Like in any other time, money spent on rent is money you cannot spend in other areas of your life.
Hiring an attorney- a decision not to take lightly
Making up your mind about hiring an attorney for your divorce is a critical juncture in your case. For one, hiring the right attorney sets a certain tone for your case. Gaining a great deal of experience in family law matters throughout your case. Maintaining a sense of stability during uncertain times is what an attorney brings to your case. It is no wonder why attorneys are seen as the great equalizer in a divorce case.
Divorce is famously seen as more a business transaction than anything else. A years-long relationship is broken down into its component pieces. Then, the parts are sold to the highest bidder. You get what you want most in the divorce, as a general rule. Pay the cost and you receive a benefit.
An attorney helps you understand what is most important in your case. Combine an experienced family law attorney with a great support system and you are set for your divorce. Thank you for spending part of your day with us today. Family law is an exciting and ever-changing area of the law to practice. The Law Office of Bryan Fagan serves our clients with pride. Working in our community, for our community. That is our goal and is what we do every day of the week.
Questions about the material contained in today’s blog post? Contact the Law Office of Bryan Fagan
If you have any questions about the material contained in today’s blog post please do not hesitate to contact the Law Office of Bryan Fagan. Our licensed family law attorneys offer free-of-charge consultations six days a week in person, over the phone, and via video. These consultations are a great way for you to learn more about the world of Texas family law. Additionally, we help clients understand better how the filing of a divorce or child custody case impacts their family.
Evan Hochschild was raised in Houston, TX and graduated from Cypress Creek High School. He went on to graduate from Southwestern University in Georgetown, TX with an undergraduate degree in Political Science. While in college, Evan was a four-year letterman on the Cross Country team.
Following in the footsteps of his grandfather and uncle before him, Evan attended law school after he completed in his undergraduate studies. He graduated from St. Mary’s University School of Law and has practiced in a variety of areas in the law- including family law.
Mr. Hochschild is guided by principles which place the interests of clients first. Additionally, Evan seeks to provide information and support for his clients with the heart of a teacher.
Evan and his wife have four small children together. He enjoys afternoons out and about with his family, teaching Sunday school at his church and exercising. A veteran attorney of fourteen years, Mr. Hochschild excels in communicating complex ideas in family law simply and directly.
