The effect of divorce on children: Helping your family maintain stability

If you’re a parent going through a divorce, you’ll quickly realize that your case will differ significantly from a divorce without children involved. Parents understand the profound effect of divorce on their children’s lives, as their actions can have a direct and often disproportionate impact on their well-being. With this in mind, it’s likely that as you approach your decision to divorce, your biggest concern wasn’t about hiring an attorney or figuring out the fate of the family home, but rather how to break the news to your children in a way that minimizes the emotional toll.

Without belaboring the point too much, your children will certainly be affected by your divorce no matter how stressful or stress-free the process actually is. Since your child has likely been exposed to more conflict at home than you’d prefer, it’s no wonder you want to minimize unnecessary stresses early on and throughout the divorce.

What is it about the divorce that will most likely bother your children the most?

Do you think that not seeing you or your spouse as frequently will potentially harm your children the most? What about the aforementioned exposure to fighting between you and your spouse? From my perspective, it is neither of these things. What can be potentially damaging to your children is the ever-present reality for your children that you and your spouse are fighting and in the middle of a conflict without a settlement in sight any time soon.

Seeing you and your spouse engaged not just in verbal arguments but deep-seated quarrels over the fundamental issues of your family can be especially damaging to them. Oftentimes, just moving forward with a divorce and removing the long-term issues that have led to the arguments can be of great relief to your children.

Becoming familiar with the best interest of your children

I think on a general level every parent would, if asked, say that he or she operates and makes decisions that are in the best interest of their children. Even if you are engaged in a bitter divorce case, you are unlikely to let the animosity toward your spouse affect your relationship with or parenting of your children.

This may be the saving grace for your divorce, in all actuality. If you are able to place the interests of your children before those of yourself then you will have eliminated much of the stress that your children will experience during the case.

This means that blaming your spouse for the breakup of your marriage, criticizing their parenting skills, or questioning their motivations for taking particular actions shall not occur while the divorce is ongoing. You or your spouse no longer living in the marital home will go a long way towards decreasing the opportunities for these potentially problematic interactions to occur as well.

My last point on this subject has to do with making this sort of decorum the norm for the remainder of your life. Every divorce decree in Texas will have some sort of provision included that bars you or your spouse from making derogatory comments about the other parent in front of your children. With this future in mind, you might as well start practicing this sort of behavior now so that it becomes second nature to you after the finalization of your divorce.

Avoid alienating behavior

The prohibition of derogatory language directed at your ex-spouse ties in nicely with my next piece of advice on how to help your children from feeling the brunt of the divorce’s emotional hardships. If your or your spouse’s behavior towards the other begins to affect your children’s perception of the target of your negative language, then you may be in a situation where parental alienation is occurring.

Basically, if you or your spouse are becoming emotionally or physically disconnected from your children due to one of your actions or words then this can be quite damaging to your children.

What exactly am I talking about here? Some examples of alienating behavior include manipulating your child into believing falsehoods about your spouse, purposefully ignoring requests by the other parent to speak to the children while in your care, or displaying rash and aggressive behavior towards your spouse.

All of these actions, whether intentional or not, can mean alienation. Not only will this sort of behavior negatively affect your children but it will draw the ire of your judge as well.

Mediation as a means to solve issues

Utilizing a family law mediator, rather than the court, to solve the issues of your divorce is a good method to avoid the sort of behavior that can harm your children’s psyche during your divorce.

The reason for this is mediation is extremely effective in settling cases and eliminating the need for protracted litigation and/or negotiation between you and your spouse. The less time spent discussing divisive issues, the more time you can spend parenting and easing the effect of divorce on children.

You and your spouse, no matter how upset you are with one another know what is best for your children much more so than a judge would. For this reason, if you can put aside your issues with one another for a short mediation session then a more desirable outcome should follow for you, your spouse, and your children.

In conclusion, understanding the effect of divorce on your children is crucial in navigating this challenging transition. By being mindful of their emotional needs, maintaining open communication, and providing stability, parents can help mitigate the negative impact of divorce on their children. While the process may be difficult, prioritizing your children’s well-being throughout the divorce can set the foundation for a healthier post-divorce family dynamic. Consulting a family law professional helps you manage the effects of divorce in the best way possible for everyone involved.

The Law Office of Bryan Fagan, PLLC: Family-focused attorneys for southeast Texas

If you have questions about divorce, family, or your children please do not hesitate to contact the Law Office of Bryan Fagan, PLLC today. Our licensed family law attorneys are available six days per week to meet with you to answer questions and listen to your concerns during a free-of-charge consultation. We represent clients across southeast Texas and would gladly do the same for you.

If you want to know more about what you can do, CLICK the button below to get your FREE E-book: “16 Steps to Help You Plan & Prepare for Your Texas Divorce”

Other Articles you may be interested in:

1. How Will Getting Divorced Impact My Children?
2. How to Navigate The Impact of Divorce on Children: Tips and Strategies
3. Parenting Your Children Through a Divorce
4. How to help your children succeed in school after a divorce
5. Texas Divorce Morality Clause: Be Careful What You Ask For
6. Married but dating another person during a Texas Divorce?
7. How a Parenting Class Can Help Me and My Ex-spouse Co-parent in Texas?
8. How to Co-Parent with an Addict Ex-Spouse
9. How does summer visitation work?
10. 10 Quick Tips About Parental Visitation
11. When Your Child’s Extended Family Wants Visitation in Texas
12. In Texas are Child Support and Visitation Connected?

Law Office of Bryan Fagan, PLLC | Kingwood Divorce Lawyer

The Law Office of Bryan Fagan, PLLC routinely handles matters that affect children and families. If you have questions regarding divorce, it’s important to speak with our Kingwood, TX Divorce Lawyer right away to protect your rights.

A divorce lawyer in Kingwood TX is skilled at listening to your goals during this trying process and developing a strategy to meet those goals. Contact the Law Office of Bryan Fagan, PLLC by calling (281) 810-9760 or submit your contact information in our online form.

Bryan Joseph Fagan( Attorney )

Bryan Fagan, a native of Atascocita, Texas, is a dedicated family law attorney inspired by John Grisham’s “The Pelican Brief.” He is the first lawyer in his family, which includes two adopted brothers. Bryan’s commitment to family is personal and professional; he cared for his grandmother with Alzheimer’s while completing his degree and attended the South Texas College of Law at night.

Married with three children, Bryan’s personal experiences enrich his understanding of family dynamics, which is central to his legal practice. He specializes in family law, offering innovative and efficient legal services. A certified member of the College of the State Bar of Texas, Bryan is part of an elite group of legal professionals committed to ongoing education and high-level expertise.

His legal practice covers divorce, custody disputes, property disputes, adoption, paternity, and mediation. Bryan is also experienced in drafting marital property agreements. He leads a team dedicated to complex family law cases and protecting families from false CPS allegations.

Based in Houston, Bryan is active in the Houston Family Law Sector of the Houston Bar Association and various family law groups in Texas. His deep understanding of family values and his professional dedication make him a compassionate advocate for families navigating Texas family law.