Skip to content 
Military soldiers make immense sacrifices, both emotionally and physically, to serve their country. This dedication often brings unique challenges that can impact their personal lives, especially for parents in the military. Balancing the demanding responsibilities of military service with raising children can be particularly overwhelming. Issues such as custody, child support, and visitation require careful attention and planning. However, military soldiers can find solutions by staying proactive and well-informed. By doing so, they can protect their relationships with their children while fulfilling their obligations, ensuring that both their duties as parents and as service members are respected.
Deployment and Its Impact on Custody and Visitation
Deployment often requires military parents to leave their families for months or even years. These separations test personal relationships and make it harder to maintain custody arrangements. If you’re a deployed parent with a custody agreement, you may worry about how to stay connected with your children. Long distances and limited communication can strain your role as a parent.
One of the most important steps you can take is planning for your absence. Many courts allow military parents to designate trusted individuals to use visitation time on their behalf. If you have a strong support system, this ensures that your children still maintain contact with family members who share your values and priorities. Documentation is essential to make sure everyone understands the arrangement. Judges tend to favor parents who make thoughtful plans and show dedication to their children’s well-being, even from afar.
Adjusting Child Support During Extended Summer Visits
Non-primary parents often look forward to extended summer visitation. These months provide valuable time to bond and reconnect with their children. However, they also bring financial questions. If your children live with you during the summer, should you continue paying child support at the same rate?
The answer often depends on your specific arrangement. During months when your children stay with you full-time, your co-parent’s expenses for raising them decrease. Costs like food, entertainment, and utilities drop, which can justify a temporary reduction in child support payments. Negotiating adjustments with your co-parent before the summer begins can avoid confusion and financial stress later.
You have two options for handling these adjustments. One approach is to include summer modifications in your court order. For example, you could reduce payments by 50% during July and August to account for your children staying with you. However, automatic wage withholding can complicate this option. Employers and the attorney general’s office may not always apply seasonal changes correctly, leading to unnecessary deductions.
Another option is to arrange for direct reimbursements. Under this system, you continue paying the full amount during the summer but receive partial reimbursement afterward. This method keeps things simpler for employers while ensuring that your financial contributions reflect the reality of your children’s living arrangements. Work with an attorney to decide which approach aligns best with your needs and circumstances.
Withholding Child Support Due to Denied Visitation
One of the most frustrating challenges for non-primary parents is dealing with denied visitation. Co-parents may block access to children for personal reasons, disagreements, or even as punishment for unpaid child support. However, withholding visitation violates court orders and damages the child-parent relationship.
You might feel tempted to withhold child support in response, but this can harm your case. In Texas, visitation and child support are separate issues. Failing to pay child support doesn’t give your co-parent the legal right to deny visitation. Likewise, you can’t withhold support to enforce your visitation rights. The courts handle these matters independently, so retaliation often backfires.
Instead of withholding payments, file a motion to enforce the visitation order. Judges have the authority to impose penalties on parents who violate these agreements. They may also modify orders to prevent further issues. Following the proper legal channels strengthens your case and keeps you in compliance with court expectations.
Military Parents and Custody: Is Primary Custody an Option?
Many military parents worry about their chances of gaining primary custody. Fathers often feel the courts favor mothers in custody decisions, but this perception doesn’t align with modern family law. Judges focus on the child’s best interests, considering factors like stability, education, and emotional well-being.
Military parents face unique hurdles in custody cases, especially regarding work schedules and frequent relocations. Irregular hours, deployment obligations, and limited control over assignments make it difficult to demonstrate stability. However, these challenges don’t automatically disqualify you from primary custody.
To strengthen your case, address potential concerns head-on. Show how you’ve created a stable environment for your children despite military demands. Highlight your ability to provide consistent care, access to quality schools, and opportunities for personal growth. Judges also consider the parent’s willingness to foster relationships between the child and their co-parent. Demonstrating cooperation and flexibility can work in your favor.
Flexibility is crucial for military parents seeking custody. Traditional visitation schedules may not fit your circumstances, but courts often approve custom arrangements that reflect the realities of military life. For example, you might request extended visitation during leave periods or propose alternative schedules during deployments. Proactive planning and open communication with your co-parent can make these arrangements more effective.
Overcoming Challenges as a Military Parent
Military parents often worry about how their roles affect their children. While deployments and irregular schedules pose challenges, they also present opportunities to create unique experiences. Cultural exchanges, international travel, and exposure to diverse communities enrich children’s lives in ways that civilian families may not offer.
To overcome the obstacles of military life, stay involved in your children’s lives, even from a distance. Use technology to maintain communication during deployments. Video calls, emails, and shared activities like online games help build strong connections. Showing consistent effort demonstrates your commitment to your children, both to them and to the court.
Another important strategy is preparing for unexpected changes. Military schedules can shift without warning, so having contingency plans is essential. Document your plans for childcare, schooling, and visitation, and share them with your co-parent and attorney. This proactive approach ensures your children’s needs remain a priority, even when challenges arise.
How Courts View Military Service
Judges understand that military service involves unique demands. While these responsibilities can complicate custody arrangements, they don’t automatically count against you. Courts appreciate parents who actively work to balance their duties with their children’s needs.
If you’re stationed far from your co-parent, you may need to address how relocations affect custody. Courts evaluate factors like educational opportunities, support networks, and the impact of distance on the parent-child relationship. Showing that you’ve carefully considered these issues helps demonstrate your dedication to your children’s well-being.
Additionally, some judges view the opportunities associated with military life as a benefit. Access to diverse cultures, travel experiences, and strong community support can positively influence children’s development. Emphasizing these advantages may strengthen your case for custody or increased visitation.
Seeking Legal Guidance
Navigating family law as a military parent can feel overwhelming, but you don’t have to face it alone. An experienced family law attorney understands the unique challenges of military life and can help you create a strong case. They’ll guide you through custody negotiations, child support modifications, and enforcement actions, ensuring your rights are protected.
Numerous resources are also available to support military families. Organizations like Military OneSource and local legal aid offices provide free advice and assistance tailored to service members. Taking advantage of these resources can help you make informed decisions and build a case that reflects your children’s best interests.
In conclusion, military soldiers face distinctive challenges when balancing their service duties with family responsibilities. Addressing issues like custody, child support, and visitation requires proactive planning and a deep understanding of the unique circumstances military parents face. By staying informed and working closely with legal professionals, military soldiers can protect their relationships with their children while fulfilling their service commitments. Through thoughtful preparation and clear communication, military parents can navigate the complexities of family life and ensure a stable, supportive environment for their children, despite the challenges posed by their service.
Contact the Law Office of Bryan Fagan
If you need help with custody, visitation, or child support issues as a military parent, the Law Office of Bryan Fagan offers expert guidance. Our licensed family law attorneys provide free consultations six days a week in person, by phone, or via video. Let us help you understand your options and create a plan that supports your family’s needs.
Ebook
If you want to know more about what you can do, CLICK the button below to get your FREE E-book: “Child Custody E-Book”
Other Articles you may be interested in:
- Losing Child Custody During Military Deployment
- Military Custody
- Understanding Texas Military Custody Issues
- Do you have to pay child support if you have 50/50 custody in Texas
- Are Dads at a Disadvantage when trying to win 50/50 custody in a Texas Divorce?
- Can I Make a Signed Note From My Ex Granting Me Legal Custody
- Grounds For Changing A Custody Order In Texas
- What do you Risk if the Custody Order is not Modified before you move?
- When Can a Minor Child Weigh in on Custody Decisions in Texas?
- Child Custody Geographic Restrictions in Texas
Law Office of Bryan Fagan, PLLC | Houston, Texas Child Custody Lawyers
The Law Office of Bryan Fagan, PLLC, routinely handles matters that affect children and families. If you have questions regarding child custody, it’s important to speak with one of our Houston, TX child custody lawyers right away to protect your rights.
Our child custody lawyers in Houston, TX, are skilled at listening to your goals during this trying process and developing a strategy to meet those goals. Contact the Law Office of Bryan Fagan, PLLC by calling (281) 810-9760 or submit your contact information in our online form.
