When facing questioning in a deposition as part of your family law case, it’s natural to feel immense pressure. However, it’s important to remember that the outcome of your entire case doesn’t hinge solely on this deposition. To alleviate some of the stress, here are some tips for deposition: Stay focused on the questions asked, answer honestly, and avoid volunteering unnecessary information. By keeping these tips in mind, you can navigate the deposition process with confidence.

In actuality, a deposition is but one of many parts that encompass a divorce or child custody case. You don’t want to put undue pressure on yourself to say or act a certain way in your deposition. This will make you feel uncomfortable. It will not lead to you doing anything but acting out of character in your deposition. You don’t want to appear dishonest or have your credibility questioned.

If you have not already done so, I recommend that you go back and read through yesterday’s blog post.  We provided you with information about how to approach your family law deposition. The goal is getting in and getting out without having damaged your case. Even if you have undergone depositions in other contexts or testified in family law hearings previously, the insights we’ve shared are crucial for your overall success.

With that said, let’s further explore this topic. We’ll share some tips and tricks on how to prepare yourself for a deposition.

The end goal of your family law case is to succeed in a trial- if necessary

When I state that a trial may or may not be necessary, I do so with a fair amount of confidence that your family law case will not go all the way to a trial. Most family law cases settle before reaching trial, often through mediation. There are many advantages to settling your case before going to trial, perhaps foremost among being that you and your spouse will be able to work with one another to craft solutions to your family’s problems directly. While you two may not see eye to eye on much, you both know the problems and opportunities within your family better than anyone. You certainly know your family better than a judge will, even after the judge learns about you all and your family through a day or two of trial.

Preparing for Trial: Protecting Your Goals from Deposition Risks

Your divorce or child custody case may be the exception that proves the rule when it comes to needing to go to a trial. If your case does proceed down this path, the only mindset that you should have at that point is to accomplish as many of your goals within the trial setting as is possible. With that said, you do not want to give away any ground in a deposition that can cost you some of those goals in the trial itself.

In a deposition, your attorney may choose to not bombard your wife with accusations that you have made about her infidelity or other bad acts. This is because it may make more sense to wait until your trial to level those accusations on her in front of a judge in open court. If you and your attorney are in the information gathering stage of your case and are not prepared to question your spouse in detail about those actions, it is unwise to do so and risk losing credibility or the potential momentum this issue could provide you within a trial.

Do not give your spouse any ammunition to be used against you in a trial

One of the best tips for deposition is to provide as little information as possible to your spouse and their attorney. They are using the deposition to gather information about your case and potential evidence for trial. You should avoid exposing yourself too much during a deposition, although some information will inevitably be shared. However, you are the only person who has any control over the words that come out of your mouth.

Do not feel compelled to overly wordy answers to the questions of the attorney for your spouse. Do not lull yourself into a false sense of security because the attorney is using a soft voice or is smiling in your general direction while asking you questions. Similarly, don’t feel pressured to give certain answers or face consequences due to an overly aggressive or demanding demeanor.

The way that you present yourself should not be animated, angry, aggressive, passive or anything extreme. You should not come off as flippant or sarcastic. Your demeanor should be professional, unemotional and to the point. Give direct answers to the questions that you understand and have a response to. Saying that you don’t know or can’t recall the answer to a question is perfectly fine. It is much better to state this than to give an answer that you are not sure of.

Be honest and be no more than that

Your only duty in a deposition is to give honest answers. This is among tips for deposition you should keep in mind. If your honest answer is either yes or no, that is perfectly fine. You do not need to feel that unless you are “fully” honest you are being deceitful in some way. That is not the case. If you are not being honest then you should worry about the consequences if and when your case makes it all the way to a trial. However, if you are honest with your responses you should not worry if your answers are sufficient.

Prepare for your deposition well in advance

As soon as you find out that you will have to be deposed in your family law case you should start to prepare. This does not mean that you need to request school records or start reading books about the law. However, what it does mean is that if you know that you have a lot to learn about your child or that you have a tendency to forget information when you are nervous, you should use your time before your deposition to prepare as best as you can.

For instance, if you are going to be asked questions about your child’s school, their doctor or their extracurricular activities it would make sense for you to know the names of your child’s teachers, coaches, and close friends. It will not work out in your favor if you walk into a deposition with incomplete or incorrect answers to questions that should be fairly simple. Especially if you are a father you should be aware that attorneys will ask questions not like this because they are interested in learning more about your children.

Rather, these questions are an attempt to make you look silly or to intimidate you by exposing a lack of knowledge of your kids. You may be a very nurturing father, but if you don’t know the name of your child’s soccer coach that could cause you to feel like you are not “worthy” of being the primary conservator. If you were to back off on your position that you should be named as such, your spouse’s attorney will have done their job.

What should be considered essential information in your family law case?

When answering questions in your deposition, it’s essential to be well-informed about certain details. For example, you should know the names of all your child’s teachers or daycare providers. Additionally, if your child attends school, you should be aware of their performance in each class and be ready to provide specific grades if asked.

Moreover, if your child has visited the doctor recently for any reason, you should know the doctor’s name, the clinic where they practice, and the reason for seeking treatment with that physician. You may not have been able to take her to the doctor but you should know where she is going and the reason for that treatment.

Articulating Positions in Child Custody Trials

One thing that you need to be able to do is to make arguments for your positions. This may not be true in a deposition but certainly will be in a trial. For instance, if you and your spouse hold differing views about where your child should go to school, you need to know the differences between the school district that you are proposing and the one where your spouse is proposing. What are the differences in class size? How far from each of your homes would the child’s school be? If you can provide concise and clear answers on this subject it could go a long way towards you accomplishing your goals.

What are your plans for your child now and in the future? Namely, if you are award primary conservatorship rights over your child you need to be able to explain how you are going to make that plan work logistically with your employment. When the time comes, many parents realize that their work schedule clashes with their aspiration to be named as the primary conservator of their child.

How will you manage the pickup and drop off of your child from school or extracurricular activities? Do you have childcare/extended family available for those times when you have to work late or will be out of town completely? A deposition is a good opportunity for you to seriously evaluate how realistic a goal it is for you to ask for either 50/50 custody or primary conservatorship. This is not only a situation that could end up being a great burden for you as far as time but it can also be a situation that puts your child at a disadvantage.

Avoiding Negative Tactics Towards Your Spouse

Finally, you should not go into a deposition with the intent to make your spouse look bad. Instead, focus on providing truthful and concise answers. This approach aligns with effective tips in deposition. Many spouses that I have worked with will take any opportunity that they can to criticize, complain about or attack their spouse. Sometimes this is with good reason, many times it is just a part of being frustrated with a failing marriage or a negative situation related to their child. Even with these sort of circumstances in mind, it is not a good idea to attack your spouse in a deposition.

If you are alleging that your spouse did (or did not) do something that harmed your child, you need to be specific about those allegations. Vague statements about events in the distant past typically do not hold much water with judges. You need to be clear about what happened, the role that your spouse played in that event and how it impacted your child.

Do you have questions about family law issues in Texas? Contact the Law Office of Bryan Fagan

There is no better family law office in Southeast Texas than the Law Office of Bryan Fagan. Our attorneys possess a level of competence, experience, and professionalism that is unmatched in our area. We invite you to explore our website to learn more about family law and our office.

If you have any questions about the material that we presented in today’s blog post please do not hesitate to contact the Law Office of Bryan Fagan. We offer free of charge consultations six days a week with a licensed family law attorney. These consultations are a great opportunity to ask questions and receive direct feedback about your particular circumstances. Thank you for joining us today on our blog.

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Frequently Asked Questions about Depositions

Bryan Joseph Fagan( Attorney )

Bryan Fagan, a native of Atascocita, Texas, is a dedicated family law attorney inspired by John Grisham’s “The Pelican Brief.” He is the first lawyer in his family, which includes two adopted brothers. Bryan’s commitment to family is personal and professional; he cared for his grandmother with Alzheimer’s while completing his degree and attended the South Texas College of Law at night.

Married with three children, Bryan’s personal experiences enrich his understanding of family dynamics, which is central to his legal practice. He specializes in family law, offering innovative and efficient legal services. A certified member of the College of the State Bar of Texas, Bryan is part of an elite group of legal professionals committed to ongoing education and high-level expertise.

His legal practice covers divorce, custody disputes, property disputes, adoption, paternity, and mediation. Bryan is also experienced in drafting marital property agreements. He leads a team dedicated to complex family law cases and protecting families from false CPS allegations.

Based in Houston, Bryan is active in the Houston Family Law Sector of the Houston Bar Association and various family law groups in Texas. His deep understanding of family values and his professional dedication make him a compassionate advocate for families navigating Texas family law.