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The Law Office of Bryan Fagan’s Guide to family court success

Think back to anything in your life that you were ever apprehensive about. I’m willing to bet you that the reason you were apprehensive is that you didn’t know what to expect. It could be anything from giving a presentation to your high school English class or giving a best man’s speech for the first time at a wedding. Either way, if you have never done it before, you are probably a little nervous in the weeks and days leading up to the big event.

Those events pale in comparison to a family law case. Anyone who has ever been through a contested divorce or child custody case can tell you that it is not easy to handle the stress associated with these experiences. Not only is it personally nerve-wracking for you, but it is nerve-wracking when you consider that your children, your property, and your sense of self are on the line in many ways. It would help if you were prepared as you head into your family law case.

Over the next few days, the attorneys with the Law Office of Bryan Fagan would like to spend some time talking with you about what you can expect in your own family law cases experience. No two cases are the same, and you cannot expect to learn everything you need to know from reading this guide or from talking to a neighbor who got divorced five years ago. However, more information is better than less information- especially when the source of that information has been through divorces and child custody cases of all kinds across southeast Texas.

Act professional, Be professional

If you find yourself in need of going to court for any reason associated with your family law case, you should be aware that a courthouse and your courtroom are not your houses or your lawyer’s office. As such, you should expect to see people behaving a bit differently. You should follow suit. That doesn’t mean that you should live in fear of going to the courthouse, but it does mean that you should be aware of what sort of behavior is expected of you.

For starters, please do not go out and buy new clothes for your court date (unless you own no clothing like the ones I am about to describe). However, the clothes that you wear to court should be clean, unwrinkled, and presentable. You do not need to look like a million dollars to go to court. However, you get one first impression to make with the judge, and you ought to try and make it a good one.

If possible, men should wear pants (slacks or dress pants) and a shirt with a collar on it. Don’t go out and buy one if you already own one, but wearing a sport coat and tie looks sharp. Women should wear dresses, blouses, pants, and jackets as well. I will say that sometimes women tend to forget that they are going to court and not out on a Friday night. Leave your super high-heeled shoes, low-cut blouses, and flashy jewelry at home.

Your goal should be to look like you are taking your court appearance and your case seriously. You can do that by dressing the part. Drawing unnecessary attention to yourself may not count against you in the eyes of a judge, but it certainly will not score you any credibility points with them. Take care to watch what you wear and how you act. Speaking of how you act, let’s address that topic now.

When you are in court, your behavior will likely need to change somewhat from how you conduct yourself in your daily life. No, I’m not saying that you misbehave. I don’t know you, for one. For two, I think most people act similarly when they are at the grocery store, a restaurant, or walking down the street. Phones out, gum in our mouths, and sort of oblivious to one another. If this is starting to hit home, I don’t blame you. I do the same thing a lot of the time.

My point is that when you are in the courthouse, that sort of behavior needs to change. You need to be aware that you are being watched as soon as you step foot in your courthouse. In some large counties like Harris, you will feel like one of a couple of thousand people because that is exactly what you are. In smaller counties like Liberty or Chambers, you will feel like one of a couple of people because, depending on the day and time of your hearing, you may be just one of a few people in the building. Either way, your opposing party, attorney, family, and even courtroom personnel can observe how you act as soon as you walk inside.

It would help if you were careful to speak quietly and act conservatively when in the courthouse and your specific courtroom. Keep your phone in your pocket. Many courts have ruled that you cannot use your phone for any reason. Suppose the bailiff (a police officer in the courtroom) observes you on your phone. In that case, they may take and keep it until the day is over with at 5:00 p.m. Bailiffs tend to make announcements about being on the phone every so often, so keep your ears open so you don’t miss important information.

Answering questions in your hearing

All of the advice I just gave to you pales compared to the importance of the information below. The reason you are in court is to provide a judge with testimony about your case. You are not there to ask questions (although you may want to) or do anything else. The attorneys and the judge can ask you questions in your hearing, and you should be prepared to give answers to those questions.

It would help if you spoke directly to the person asking you the question. Suppose you do not have a loud speaking voice. That is ok. You don’t need to yell to be heard. Speak clearly and with enough volume so that the court reporter and judge can listen to you. All of your responses need to be given verbally. Answers with shaking of your head or “grunting” yes or no will not work.

One of the biggest things I see consistently answering questions from a judge or attorney is concerned with is that many people do not wait until the questioner is done asking their question before responding. Often, you can tell where a questioner is going with their question, and you are ready to give a response before the question has been asked and completed. This is tolerable in everyday conversation, but it jumbles up your testimony in the courtroom and makes the court reporter’s job even more difficult. My advice: make sure that the questioner is done asking you your question. When the question has been asked, take a moment to collect your thoughts and make sure that you understand the question before giving an honest answer.

Respect will get you a long way in the courtroom.

Always show respect to the people around you while in court. Even if you are upset with your spouse, you should treat them well when answering questions. Mrs. or Mr. for title purposes is a nice touch. It goes without saying that when anyone asks you a question, especially the judge, you should never interrupt them. They could be saying something to you that you know false. However, do not interrupt that person. Instead, please note it and address the issue with your attorney when you are off of the witness stand.

I emphasize your behavior while on the witness stand to such a great extent that you are being judged not only on what you say but also on how you act. How credible (honest) you seem while giving answers means the more weight the judge can give to your testimony. If the judge thinks you are less than honest in what you say, they may disregard much of what you have to say. Do not put yourself in a position where the judge doesn’t believe that you are being truthful.

Children- leave them at home.

I know that the focus of your family