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Post-divorce Anger Issues: Co-parenting Advice in Difficult Circumstances

Family law attorneys face a challenge when wrapping up a divorce and dealing with unresolved anger issues and resentment felt by the opposing party towards their client.

Learning how to regulate emotions is an important part of being an adult, but even adults can struggle with their personal feelings when they are going through a divorce. Not only are you eliminating the most important relationship in your life but you are throwing the equilibrium of your house off to a great extent.

It makes sense to feel uneasy, and it makes sense to feel like a part of you is going away forever. If your spouse has done something to harm your children or harm you directly it makes further sense to feel betrayed and direct feelings of anger towards your soon to be ex-spouse.

It is the experience of the attorneys with the Law Office of Bryan Fagan, PLLC that when an opposing party experiences anger towards a client of ours it is the children of the marriage that take that anger to heart more so than anyone else.

Obviously just because you are divorcing your spouse, it doesn’t mean that your interactions with that person will cease the day that your divorce decree is signed by a judge. The most important aspect of your former marriage, raising your child, is still in place even if your marriage no longer is.

Warning Signs to Identify and Mitigate During the Divorce Process

If you notice your spouse engaging in even more frequent arguments with you that leads to attempts at intimidation of any kind as well as attempts to alienate your children from you, these may be signs of a soon to be ex-spouse with anger issues.

How can you address these concerns with your spouse during the time period that you are seeking to divorce them?

I have seen clients with health insurance encourage their spouse to take advantage of family therapy sessions with medical providers that are on their insurance plan. If this means offering to pay any out of pocket expenses yourself I would recommend this as well.

I realize that not every family law attorney would agree with this course of action but in my opinion, this is a show of goodwill that can pay dividends not only for you but for your children.

Getting a head start on allowing your spouse an opportunity to express their feelings in a productive fashion will most likely lead to an easier time beginning the co-parenting process. It may also lead to your spouse being more agreeable during the negotiation process which can save time, money and stress for both of you.

Co-parenting with an ex-spouse after your divorce

Children benefit from maintaining relationships with both parents. Numerous studies show that kids who spend time with both parents tend to do better in school and socially.

Your child may not understand the reasons behind your divorce and might not be concerned. They just know that mom and dad don’t live together, and they miss spending time with both of you.

Co-parenting means sharing goals with your former spouse, which encourages communication. Working together to raise a healthy and happy child can lead to surprising ease in your relationship with your ex-spouse.

The key advice for fostering a positive co-parenting atmosphere is to establish a routine for the child during their time with each parent.

Whether you stick to the court-ordered visitation schedule or create a customized one with your ex-spouse, the ultimate aim is for your child to have clarity about when and where they’ll see their mom or dad.

Collaborate with your ex-spouse to synchronize bedtimes, mealtimes, and nap times in both households. This helps ensure the child perceives consistent expectations in both homes.

Another way to minimize the change in circumstances for the child is for both parents to do their best to not exacerbate differences in income. If you earn a great income that is terrific but attempting to buy your way into the heart of your child is not only ineffective but can alienate your ex-spouse to the point where co-parenting isn’t possible.

I understand it’s unrealistic to check in with the ex-spouse when it comes to making purchases but keeping expenditures on the child to a reasonable level is healthy nonetheless.

Questions about your divorce and post-divorce life? Contact the Law Office of Bryan Fagan, PLLC

If you find yourself in a situation where you believe is divorce is necessary for you and your spouse please do not hesitate to contact the divorce attorneys of the Law Office of Bryan Fagan, PLLC. Problem-solving with an experienced family law attorney may be the difference between a relatively stress-free divorce and a divorce that makes a bad situation even worse.

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Law Office of Bryan Fagan, PLLC | Kingwood Divorce Lawyer

The Law Office of Bryan Fagan, PLLC routinely handles matters that affect children and families. If you have questions regarding divorce, it’s important to speak with ar Kingwood, TX Divorce Lawyer right away to protect your rights.

A divorce lawyer in Kingwood TX is skilled at listening to your goals during this trying process and developing a strategy to meet those goals. Contact Law Office of Bryan Fagan, PLLC by calling (281) 810-9760 or submit your contact information in our online form. The Law Office of Bryan Fagan, PLLC handles Divorce cases in Spring, Texas, Cypress, Spring, Klein, Humble, Kingwood, Tomball, The Woodlands, Houston, the FM 1960 area, or surrounding areas, including Harris County, Montgomery County, Liberty County, Chambers County, Galveston County, Brazoria County, Fort Bend County and Waller County.

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At the Law Office of Bryan Fagan, PLLC, the firm wants to get to know your case before they commit to work with you. They offer all potential clients a no-obligation, free consultation where you can discuss your case under the client-attorney privilege. This means that everything you say will be kept private and the firm will respectfully advise you at no charge. You can learn more about Texas divorce law and get a good idea of how you want to proceed with your case.

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